I was somewhere online hopping and stumbled on Porn for Pregnant Ladies. That’s some funny stuff isn’t it? But I think there is some better porn that pregnant ladies & mom ladies would like a lot better.

Sit back, lock your door & enjoy yourself ladies.

Was it good for you?

In the past when I have to be an occasional single parent for the evening dinner is usually at my parents house or macaroni & cheese or a bowl of cereal. I never got the point of cooking just for me & Phoenix so I usually throw together whatever I can find that can be done in the microwave. But a few months ago Shawn got really super busy and I hadn’t cooked in a long time  & I absolutely love to cook. I decided that at least twice a week I would make the boys & I a good home cooked meal. A few weeks ago I threw this fried rice together and loved it so I decided to share.

Here is the most important thing to know about my recipes. I am not a Martha Stewart and even if I use a recipe to get started I hardly every stay true to it. I don’t always know how much of something I use & I season to taste with almost everything. Feel free to change any of my measurements. Also I am not a food blogger so my food pictures don’t look that great. But I’m telling you this was good. 

In a wok or large frying pan cook garlic, ginger, & pork in the oil for about 5 minutes or until pork is almost done over medium heat. Next add in the carrots & green onions until the carrots start to soften. Add in your two eggs and scramble them with the meat & veggies. Once your eggs are done add in peas. Cook all together until the peas have been cooked through 3 maybe 4 minutes. Not too long because you don’t want the peas to get mushy. 

At this point your rice should be done dump into your wok. The amount of rice you cook can be totally up to you. I cook the rice according to the package which is about 1 cup of uncooked rice, but if I am making it for just the boys & I, I will only use about half the rice and freeze the rest or save for Caspian to have during the week. 

Add in your hot rice and a few shakes of soy sauce & your sriracha. You can use both of these to taste, more srirachi if you like spicy, less if you don’t. Once everything has been mixed together I dump in cut up avocado and stir it up a little longer until its warm.

And that’s it! You can add anything else you want to this mixture or take away anything you don’t think will work for you like maybe the avocado. I’ve never done avo before but I had one the first time I made it and thought it tasted delicious. Let me know if you try it. 

How do you like the new digs? A new blog design has been so so so so long coming. My last one, let us just be honest was really bad. I hated looking at every time I would log on. I also hated the weird way it would format the post & pictures. It was all kinds of bad & annoying. But thanks to the talented Sarah at One Starry Night I have gotten a much needed overhaul. Besides the new look the other new addition is the Best Of page. If you are a new reader or sporadic reader this might be a good place for you to check out.

The reasons things have been so quiet lately have been major acts of God. First was me getting sick. I thought I might have had a breast infection a few weeks ago. I had a fever, chills, & extreme body aches but after piling on 10 covers one night I woke up feeling really good, unfortunately because I was really looking forward to having Shawn take over for the day & lay in bed. But Mother’s Day is around the corner…

After getting over that, last Sunday morning my 20 year old brother had a motorcycle accident on his way to lifeguard training. He broke some fingers & got a huge gash in his knee that required surgery for both and we are hoping that he will regain full use of his hand. It has been a really tough week because yes, he survived but none of us could stop thinking about how he almost didn’t. He was hit by a cab & went flying in the air. The thing that shook me the most was hearing him say that as he was being hit he said to himself “this is it.” I couldn’t stop thinking about how scared he must have been & how he was all alone. We are incredibly, incredibly grateful that he is alive & instead of going to appointments at a funeral home we have the honor of being able to take him to the doctors. And to top the week off on Thursday a teenager brought a gun to my sister’s high school & the school was on lockdown for 5 hours. Luckily she wasn’t there, but OMG close calls for us all around. 

That was Sunday; on Tuesday Shawn & I had a really busy day dealing with business stuff when we noticed a bad rash spreading all across Caspian’s neck & head. The night before he kept waking up scratching at his head but I didn’t put two & two together until late in the afternoon when we were in the sunlight and I noticed he was digging in to his skin. Luckily we only spent an hour in urgent care, but because he was so uncomfortable he had trouble sleeping for the next couple of nights.

Throw in regular everyday stress (but up the pressure) and you have my last few weeks. Things have been just incredibly emotional & a couple of “Why Me’s”. But you know what they say. If Britney Spears can survive 2007 I can survive anything. 

Some days he’s all…

Why do you always make me do stuff I don’t want to do?

Gosh! I hate this!

I’m running away!

Your house is boring!

I’m not going to eat your nasty food.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

This is dumb.

Your dumb.

Dumb.

Dumb.

Dumb.

I hate chores!

I am a teenager!

I want to stay up until 9 billion.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Mommy you have to go to sleep when I do.

It’s not fair!

I don’t want to go school.

I hate school.

Homework is boring.

And then some days he’s all…

Mom I love you, I’m going to buy you a magazine.

If you follow me on Twitter you heard me desperately cry out for help on Friday as we almost witnessed a complete and utter maternal catastrophe in nature. Walking home from Phoenix’s school we passed a man-made waterfall/pond in front of an apartment complex that had a Mommy duck & 13 of her little babes swimming around. Caspian was fast asleep in his Ergo so we decided to watch them for a bit. After watching them for almost an hour the unthinkable happened. At this particular complex there were two pond areas so after swimming in one & unsuccessfully trying to make it across the street the mother duck started over to the next pond with the ducklings.  She jumped up on the curb & made it in & 5 other ducklings did as well. Before the rest could hop onto the sidewalk & get in the water a lady starts taking pictures of the ducks with her dog very close behind her. The ducks were so frightened by this dog that 8 of them fell down the sewer drain. The mother duck after realizing she was short ducks gets out of the water & starts quacking. The ducks who were in the water get out & fall down the drain as well! I was frozen in my inability to help the ducks & had no idea what to do. The mother duck was frantic & quacking & waddling in circles & I was on the verge of tears.

While we watched them I became mesmerized by how she carried on much like a human mother. When they tried to cross the street & couldn’t she quacked for them to stop & they stopped. When one of them didn’t fall back in line she jumped out & grabbed his neck just as he was almost ran over. And now here she was losing all but two of her babies. I was frantic with worry & just as I was about to call animal rescue some of the maintenance men from the apartment complex came out, climbed down the drain & rescued the babies. Once the ducks had been reunited they climbed back in the water & continued their leisurely swim & the mother stopped quacking.

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If any of you have a 4 year old out there you know the level of obedience you receive from them on any given day. You know that most of your day consists of counting, daring, begging, empty threats & promises of rewards. You go from one crisis to the next often without a breath in between. At the end of the day I’m exhausted & drained from the battle of wits against my son. Even in the middle of the night there is no break as I battle with him to keep his legs, arms, & head, to himself. I’ve explained the virtues of obedience and why it’s better than sacrifice-something I heard a lot growing up. But we hardly ever get traction before we are right back at it again.

My love for him runs deep, very, very deep but sometimes I look at him when he’s misbehaving & want to shake him & yell “Listen to me! I know best! I know best! I know best! I’m trying to help you.” but obviously I don’t shake him. I just sit, often with my head in my hands & wonder what & why having a 4 year old can be so very difficult.

But then Friday came & a duck & her ducklings hopefully helped get my son to understand the importance of being obedient. I’ve been trying to talk to him about consequences lately but I’m not sure he fully gets it. But there before his eyes consequences played out.  I’ve had to remind him almost every single day, several times a day since Friday “Remember the baby ducks”. 

I know that today when he comes homes from school will be another battle to get him to finish homework, to gently put the baby down, to do his chores with a cheerful attitude, stop jumping, stop screaming, stop whining, stop this, stop that. I know the lesson of the ducks might fade away in a few days but maybe, just maybe it won’t.